Saturday, December 30, 2017

Talking Dog Jokes

Trying something a little different. On this blog I have some serious posts and some attempts at humor. This post is one of the latter. If you don't care for my style of humor, I hope you can simply skip over my humor posts and we can still be friends.

Here is the original joke, and below are my own variations:

I'm walking my dog, and I run into a neighbor.
"Cute dog!" my neighbor says.
"Yeah, she's actually a talking dog."
"A talking dog? Nonsense. There's no such thing."
"Oh yeah? Hey, Lucy, what's the thing on top of a house?"
"Roof!"
"What's the stuff on the outside of a tree?"
"Bark!"
"Okay. How does singer/songwriter Gotye feel about his recent breakup?"
"Rough!"

(Neighbor shakes his head, mutters "Bullshit!" and walks away. I just kind of look at Lucy and shrug.)
Lucy: (mustering my best Scooby Doo voice) "I mean, he wrote an entire fucking song about it. I'd say he feels downright shitty."

And here's a different ending starting from the third question:
"When the neighborhood stud dog breaks into the yard, what kind of sex do you guys have?"
"Rough!"
(Neighbor shakes his head and walks away.)
Lucy: "I would have said 'doggy style with lots of neck biting', but I thought that description would be a little too graphic for him."

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